Characters in this post
View character profile for: Jaxx
View character profile for: Evelina Stone
View character profile for: Maidbot OU812
View character profile for: Bif Biggles aka Jaxx's alter Ego
View character profile for: Unn Able OU812B48 NPC
View character profile for: Lafayette Chapel
View character profile for: Scaver
View character profile for: Bif's Emohawk Gun
View character profile for: Skyler "Skippy" Kippler
View character profile for: Bonbon
Posted: May 14, 2018, 11:44am
Skippy ignored her focusing on her soldering "But if our math was off, no offence Bif but it would take three super computers you are smart but not that smart. If it was off it'd rip this rust bucket to ribbons and we would either die from fire, freezing in space or being crushed by the sudden shift in gravity added to our squishy fleshy bodies." she added.
"We need to focus. BIF! How certain are you of being able to do the math that Carrot Cake suggested?" he asked taking charge. "I mean, I need a .01% margin here." he said. "This thing is about 100x bigger then a Starbug and if I am gonna pull this off I need everyone to be sure this will work." he said.
"Why are their only 5 of you?" she asked "A ship like this should have subjects...a crew... what ever you wish to call it." Bonbon said. "And why is it so dusty. Do you have to shame?" she contained a laugh, she had quickly gone back to her old annoying self.
Bif giggled like a maniacal nerd who overdosed on caffeine and sugar.
Bif: Ladies...ladies....ladies....your concern is touching but there is plenty of room on the Goodship Biggles.
Bif mad a bad attempt at a smolder as he rubbed his non-existing pecs. His nasally voice made everyone cringe and he had a tendency to spit when talking proudly as he tried to be manly while touching himself like a freaky perv.
Bif: Well to answer your questions a Gravity slingshot will indeed rip this old rust bucket in half since it is about three million years past its last update.....hence the current state of the ship my little naughty Lepis. Most of the crew died in a radiation leak so you might want to be careful what you touch on this ship. And for your questions my sexy tech girl....(wink)....My genius is top notch but its pointless if the ship can't take the stress on it. So I am going to do something far more realistic.
Eve: Oh do tell your geekiness.
Bif: I love it when you talk dirty to me Evebabe. You will by number one in my harem.
Eve: I think I threw up in my mouth a bit.
Bif: Nothing a bit of love won't fix.
Eve: Ewwww. So what are you gonna do about the ship guppy boy.
Bif: Simple Evebabe I am going to open a wormhole and bypass the planet completely.
Eve: And how pray tell will you do that?
Bif: Simple Evebabe.......I reconfigured the time device you guys had on hand. I not only fixed it but I added to it as well. All I have to do is install our jump coordinates and wa la instant jump.
Eve: You can really do that?
Bif: Oh shanti my dessert flower. I am holding you to that kiss now.
Bif entered a few more calculations into the console and after an hour they were ready to make the jump.
Bif: Okay folks that will be a bumpy ride (nerd laugh) so hang on.
Bif activated his console and used the array on the Dwarf to emit a distortion field and create a wormhole to bypass the planet they were going to crash at. Then suddenly the whole ship shook a lot like it was in an earthquake as they passed through the wormhole and many freaky images appeared in the windows. Then suddenly they exited the wormhole and the shaking stopped as they did a damage check only to find they took little damage but traveled a million light years off course.
Bif: Did I do thaaaaaaaaaat!??
Eve then shot him in the back with the Emohawk gun to turn Bif into Jaxx.
Eve: That was a close one.
Jaxx: Whoa.......oh hey Evebabe. What did I miss?
Tag (We are a million light years off course but we are safe for now)