Captain's orders

Clutching his damaged breastplate and staggering forward, Fate stared down the length of Lyra's quivering needle. In an instant he could snap her neck or drive that needle into her own eyeball.

But Krueger was never one to miss a chance to impress the ladies. Frost axe in hand, he dove between the two.

"I don't think so, chrome dome," he yelled, holding the hefty axe aloft.

"I see you've chosen stwonger awies than usuwal, Doctor," Fate said, directing his voice towards the unconscious viking. "Owl be back for awl of you!"

And with that, a glowing blue rift opened up behind him. Through it, red and blue flags could be seen flying and troops marching to grainy parade music. Fate stepped backwards, causing the surface to ripple like water as he crossed through it. An instant later the portal winked out of existence.

Krueger let out a breath of relief and dropped the frost axe. It clattered loudly as it hit the deck.

"Okay gang, I dunno about the rest of you, but I'm going to need a drink, an explanation, probably another drink, and a room adjoining Miss Lyra's for the evening. ...And probably another drink," Krueger said.

Then his eye drifted to the gunslinger in the hallway. At first, he was sure that there were two people there. But as he turned his head, he saw that there was only one; Doctor... Bones? No... House? No...

"Doctor... Jurran! By the power of Greyskull! How'd you end up here? I was sure I was the only survivor," he said.

----------

"Nuhhh...," Ogden groaned as the world slowly came back to him.

Then he was violently shaken into full wakefulness.

"Cap! Wake the hell up," Krueger yelled, still jerking him about.

"By Odin's beard, young man! I'm awake already," Ogden barked.

Oh, his head hurt something fierce! That Fate character really packed a- Wait! Where was he! Ogden jumped to his feet, fists ready to return the favor in kind!

"Woah, Cap! He's gone. He is a 'he', isn't he?" Krueger said.

"What... what happened?" Ogden asked, bewildered.

Krueger took an inhumanly deep draw from his cigar before speaking, "Well, after he clobbered you, our resident Jedi here went to town on him. Then, my good friend Dr. Jurran performed a little surgery on his knee caps. And last but definitely not least, Lyra here was just about to skewer the bastard when he made is escape."

"Thank you, all of you. I don't believe we've met, Dr. Jurran. But a friend of Mr. Krueger is a friend of mine. My crew could certainly use a real doctor onboard, if you're interested," Ogden said.

In fact, if he wasn't mistaken, he was quite certain that he'd run into an entire hospital section of the ship during his wanderings. He'd have to consult with the shaving robot to find it again. Such a polite, if not so talkative-

"Yeah, yeah, yeah... Enough about that. I think it's time you explained to us, and the viewers at home, what's going on here," Krueger said, dragging his thoughts back to the present.

Ogden let out a lengthy sigh.

"Well, as some of you may know, the former captain of this ship was a man named Doctor... what was his name again?" he looked at Lyra and Vivienne but neither of them seemed to remember either.

Very strange. Very strange, indeed.

"Well, anyway, he was an alien at war with this Fate character. And he conscripted the three of us to fight it for him. After Earth was destroyed, we managed to stage a mutiny and took over the ship. ...But it seems Fate has decided that *I* am the Doctor now," Ogden explained.

"Wait! Earth was destroyed?" someone stammered.

"Yes. At least in this universe, anyway," Ogden answered. "And seeing as Fate wants all of our heads, I think it best that we stick together."

"Alright Cap, then what's the first order of business?" Krueger asked.

"Well, currently we have three miscreants roaming the ship to take care of. Mister Krueger, would you please stay behind and get to work on those shield emitters you mentioned? I'd like to be able to make a quick getaway if need be. Once that's all handled, I'd like to see what we can do for those poor souls we left in the city below," Ogden ordered.

"What about Fate?" someone asked.

"I'm working on that. But for now, you have your orders," Ogden said.

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