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Character Ned

View character profile for: Ned

Small but feisty!

With eyes less keen in the dark than elves and goblins, but more so than humans, Ned was just able to perceive that something was going on around them in the darkness. Something was weaving itself through the trees.

"My friends," he said in a tone that drew everyone's attention. "I do not believe we are alone."

Then came the unmistakable sound of approaching wargs. Fear and panic began to well up inside of the little Gnome's chest. His heart began to beat like that of a hummingbird. Despite the cold, his forehead beaded with sweat. Finally!

Ned took off running, surprisingly fast for one with such short legs. He could hear the sound now of massive paws, tearing up the snow as it ran. Then, perhaps curious about the little prey-sized creature running toward rather than away from it, the warg slowed its pace. Ned easily ran right under the wire strung across the trees, a single barb snatching his pointed hat from atop his head.

Facing off with the warg, it was biiiiiig! Despite the fierceness of his charge, it easily swatted him with a massive paw. Razor sharp claws shredded his gamison and sent him flying. A tree caught him in mid flight and he fell to the ground with an oomph.

"Alright, ye beasty...," he said, dragging himself to his feet.

The warg growled and gnashed its great maw. Hot spittle dripped to the snow and steam rose up. Ned growled back.

"I suppose ye haven't heard of all the great Gnomish warriors of the world. Thats fair... There aren't many, after all. But before ye stands one 'a the fiercest," Ned said.

With that said, he charged the beast again. ...And it swatted him again. But this time he brought Snagga to bare. ...And Snagga transformed into a VCR. Though it spared him any serious harm, Snagga shattered into a million pieces. Ned stepped back, holding some fragment of the broken device in his grasp. The warg snickered and began closing the distance.

It was now within a foot of Ned. He could feel its hot breath on his face, blowing his hair back. It opened its powerful jaws wide, wide enough to easily fit his entire head. And then the many pieces of Snagga began to shake in the snow and then fly back together in Ned's hand. As they flew past it, the warg was startled enough to close its mouth and sheepishly step back. He seized his chance and struck!

Snagga transformed into a cherry pie and splattered all over the warg's head and shoulders. It shook its head, but the cherry filling was so sticky that it would not go anywhere. Enraged, it barked and pounced.

Ned ducked and rolled forward as its massive bulk sailed overhead. The warg landed and immediately spun around to attack again.

"Ye've just bore witness to my most devistatin' attack, beasty. And ye don't even realizeit yet," Ned declared.

But the warg didn't care. It mearly howled and pounced again. But in mid flight, it howled and fell to the ground as the many droplets of cherry pie began to form back together with the beast's head caught in the middle. A second later its head was a bloody pulp with Snagga laying in the middle of the great mess.

"Heh. Told ye!" Ned said, retrieving his grizzly weapon.

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