Dean, in the Upper Promenade, with a hamster ... And a door jam?!?

Who: Dean, Phil, Andromdea, Polymorph and your resident six foot one
inch, hamster Captain.
Where: Among the terrorized crowds of the promenade.
When: While we're still committing wholesale renovation!
<snnaaaa... ssnnnnnnahhh... Snnnniiiippp!>
WW flung the pile of ticking grenades at the PolyMorph, both stopping
it and leaving just the mummy to be slaughtered.
"Hell yeah!" WW yelled dowing his victory dance, before the PolyMorph
extended a sucker and took all his triumphalism away.
"Whoops." said Dean, getting up from his position on the floor. "Damn
things." he muttered, rearranging his breasts again...
<end snip with a case of the flu.>
"I feel strangely depressed." Stated the hamster as he stopped his
little dance.
"Well, that could be because of realization that you were just
recently rescued by a drag queen who can't keep his fake breasts
horizontal..." Remarked Phil sarcastically, still holding his PM
flipping off position.
"HEY!" said Dean.
"Nope - that's not it... ", Replied White Wolf.
"Would it be because, your all about to get squashed by a crate
weilding, people eating, Purple polymorph?!?" Yelled Andromeda
scrambling to get out of the way.
"That would do it!" Answered the hamster quickly following her &
Dean, as the crate descended upon Phil with a thundering
*CCCCCRRRRAAAAAASSSSSSSSHHHH*!
Phil was still standing there holding up his finger as the silly
putty & packing peanuts dripped off of him, As Andromeda & Dean
called to him, "PHIL! Are you Alright?"
Phil lowered his outstretch arm, and matter of factly stated in low
voice through clenched teeth, "I certainly hadn't expected that to
sting so much on Thursday..."
"I think today is Wednesday, Phil." Corrected White Wolf.
"Ah, That explains it! Pardon me, while I recover from my faux
pas..." Said Phil, falling over like statue and crashing to the floor.
"Smeg - I've got cooties attacking me dress! Get away you two fashion
critics!" Yells dean, as the two 'underdone mcnuggets' (Baby PM#4 & 5
from mcdonalds) rend a higher hem line on Dean's dress.
"Get rid of them! Before they sucker you!" hollers Andromeda, as one
of them extends a sucker to Dean's forehead and sucks out his sense
of fashion.
"You know, I think this needs more mirrors, ruffles and definitely a
cape!" Says Dean affecting the voice of the flamboyant Liberace, the
concert pianist.
"Too late!" Remarks the hamster raising his foot, "Let's just stomp
on the little Buggers!"
"GRRRRAAAHHHH!" Screamed the Mommy Polymorph upon seeing what he was
intending.
"Aw nuts! Here comes mommy again! Right Mr. Gucci, you help Andromeda
& I grab up Phil here, and we'll all high tail it to safety!" ordered
the hamster grabbing the unconscious Phil's left leg, while
Andromedea grabbed his right.
The group quickly hauled phil up some stairs with his head bouncing
up and down all the way, until they came to a jewelry shop door, and
the hamster set down Phil's left leg, and called out "wait here while
I get the double doors!"
"Why didn't you grab his head?" Yelled Andromeda to Dean.
"I didn't want to get my hands all greasy from his oily hair!"
"Well, why not his shoulders then?"
"Hey, we both know where Mini-phil comes from, would you want the
original to suddenly wake up starring up your dress?"
"Point. Alright, I'm wearing pants, I'll switch with you." Said
Andromedea taking Dean place, and picking up Phil by his shoulders.
The hamster came back and picked Phil's leg while saying, "okay,
let's put him inside.", As he went toward the left double door, while
Dean went toward right. <CLUNK!>
"Ouch! That's gonna leave a mark and not much else!" Comments White
Wolf looking down at where they had mashed Phil's crouch into the
door jam between the set of double doors.
"Dean! Why didn't you go through the left door along with the
Captain?" Complained Andromeda.
"It looked like it was going to be too crowded over there for all of
us to go through at once!" Snapped back Dean.
"Well, we certainly can't find him in this way - come around this
way, Dean!" Yelled the agravated hamster.
"And you better hurry up, Mommy's still trying to come over and have
a word with us about child abuse!" Finished Andromeda.
Dean backed up and started trying to pull Phil's right leg around
Andromeda, and running into difficulty when Phil's body wasn't
cooperating while Andromeda and White Wolf simply rolled their eyes
heavenward.
Then the polymorph mommy came charging up the steps - Dean dropped
phils leg an remarked "I vote everyperson for themself!"
"Seconded!" Said Andromeda.
They both legged it.
White Wolf realising he was left all by himself holding phils left
leg, quickly yanked Phil inside the jewelry shop, and slammed the
clear glass doors putting his back to them as he said "Whew! Maybe
that will hold 'er!"
The polymorph smashed the glass, as the hamster muttered, "What on
earth did I think I was doing?!? This door wouldn't even hold back
Holly!" And then he quickly dashed over to phil and dragged him into
a bank vault style and slammed the door behind him, plunging him into
pitch darkness, "Alright, that wasn't exactly an improvement."
But the room was quiet for several seconds, then phil groaned as he
started wake up, "Uh - God... Everything from my waist down hurts,
and I can't see... Care to explain what I did to deserve this, Tara?"
<Tag Phil! And no offense intended. :) >
-----------
** - Yet another reference to the game of CLUE...

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