Pancake convos with an ant
Who: Justin Pancake, Baby Alota and Queen Brittany
Where: Sherwood Forest
When: 13th Century still. After Brittany and Alota found Justin
"I need to go." Justin said.
"What?! You can't just leave me!"
"Then come with me. I need to find... something."
"What do you need to find?"
Justin touched the green Hymenoptera communications device in his pocket. It passes a signal to his brain, and he pointed in a direction. "I'm going that way! Follow me if you want."
Brittany had no idea where he was going, or what he was finding, but she followed him anyway. But first she had to ask one question.
"Where's Alota?" She said in panic.
Justin shrugged. "She'll turn up" he said.
Brittany was already searching the undergrowth. She moved some bracken aside carefully and called for the small child. After a while she turned back to Justin. "Don't you care?"
He shrugged again. "Just hurry up. I need to go over there."
"Why? What's so special about over there?"
Justin shrugged again and removed the squidgy green communications device from his pocket. It flashed once. "I'm going to follow this."
Brittany threw her arms up in the air in annoyance. "Whatever. Dickhead."
As she stomped away she brushed aside a branch from an oak tree, which she didn't realise was holding up a wooden bucket. The bucket tipped and splashed rainwater all over her clothes.
"Smeg!" She called out. "What the smeg was that?"
Justin ran over and found her dripping wet. Her clothes were clinging to her body and revealing her shapely figure. The cold damp air was making her nipples pointy. Justin's heart started to race.
"Wow." He said.
"I'm soaked!" The Queen moaned. "Who puts a bucket there? In the middle of a forest?"
Justin picked up the wooden bucket and moved it over in his hands. "It's for catching rainwater. It looks like someone lives near here."
"Ugh. People live in a forest? I bet they're tramps. How disgusting." Brittany said. "I need to get out of these wet clothes."
Justin couldn't stop looking at her. The wet clothes were showing off the outline of her breasts perfectly, and her nipples seemed to be watching him. He started to feel an arousal in his groin, he was getting a semi. She turned away and removed her top.
Justin stared and raised an eyebrow. He was enjoying this.
Then there was a sharp feeling of pain as too much blood rushed to his crushed penis.
"Ow, ow ow!" he said and hopped around, clutching his erection. He'd almost recovered from the pain of having his man-organ crushed by SNIDE's super-wedgie, but getting an erection this early after it was damaged hurt too much.
He forced himself to look away from Brittany's sexy body and the swelling went down.
Justin placed the glowing Hymenoptera communicator on the floor and watched as it flashed steadily at him.
"So. What the smeg are you flashing about?" He asked it.
"We're in the 13th Century. Surely there's no Hymenoptera around now?"
"Although.... how old ARE the Hymenoptera?"
"Were there really Hymenoptera on Earth in medieval times?"
Then he remembered talking to Efof a while ago. Efof had got drunk in Parrotts bar and told Justin his entire life story. Justin really wasn't bothered, but couldn't get away. He remembered Efof telling him that his planet was invaded by Hymenoptera 600 years ago. Justin quickly did the maths on his fingers. By his reckoning they were more than 300 years in the past. So were Hymenoptera around even as early as this?
He then started to wonder if the Hymenoptera might have evolved from some smaller insects. Maybe just normal insects.
He then started to wonder that if he stood on any insects today, it might actually stop the entire Hymenoptera civilisation from evolving.
He watched as a very small ant walked over to where he had placed the Hymenoptera communicator on the ground. The ant walked over it like it was drawn to the mysterious object.
"Hey what are you doing?" Justin said to the small ant. "Oh my god. Maybe you're the very first Hymenoptera! By showing you this device from the future it will inspire you to evolve into a massive and powerful civilisation."
The ant circled the sticky green device.
"You wouldn't believe how powerful they are. They could defeat the Humans in an instant if they wanted to. They could swat them like a fly, or stomp on them like a bug." He paused. "Just like I could do to you."
He put his thumb above the ant, ready to squash it.
"I could kill you, and if you really are the ancient ancestor of the Hymenoptera... it will erase the entire Hymenoptera race from extinction. I could save the lives of millions of Humans and other aliens across the galaxy."
He hovered his thumb above the ant. The ant stopped. It was an easy target.
"But nobody would know." He said. "Nobody would know I've saved them. They wouldn't ever call me a hero." He removed his hand. "So what's the point?"
He put his face down next to the bug. "You're going to grow into the best and most powerful race of aliens ever. But when you do, remember me. Because...." He thought about it for a moment. "...because. I want in."
The ant raised itself up on it's hind legs as if it was looking at him. "You heard me bug. I want to join you. I can see how weak us Humans are alone. We've got to adapt to survive."
The glowing green Hymenoptera ball rolled over and squashed the ant underneath. It killed it outright.
"Okay you might have lots of evolving to do. But when you're ready. We can take over the galaxy. Together. You and me."
He sat back and leaned against a log. "What the smeg am I doing?"
<To be continued>