Menacing Pirate Cabin-boys
<snip>
"We were all waiters at that old bar, but now we are free do be Pirates! No more ship, no more rules! LET THE LOOTING BEGIN!"
"Unfortunately, you're all morons"
"But we have you, You can fly the ship, let us go on raids and terrorise the other refugees."
"Make me" as soon as the words came out of his mouth, Canazza wished he could suck them back in as ten pirate people surrounded him with swords.
"Look out Blue Dwarf crew, Gingerbeard is coming" Canazza was jabbed in the ribs. he turned to the controls and lay in a course for the trailing ships in the pack.</snip>Canazza sat in the pilots seat, a single guard sat in the co-pilots seat, while Captain Gingerbeard sat in the science station watching the sensor readings
The man in the co-pilots seat pointed his sword at Canazza's head.
There had been three people take shifts at watching him, occasionally jabbing him when he tried to access the communications panel. Of the three people this one was the most menacing, he was dressed in a cabin-boy outfit and had a little sailor hat on, he looked un-menacing since he had no facial hair and spectacles, however, the previous ones didn't have spectacles, or a hat.
"Hey! Fly-boy" Called Gingerbeard, "There be something coming up, I think it's a ship"
Canazza turned to look at the sensors, "Nope, just an asteroid"
Then it hit him, there was an asteroid in their path. "Oh bollocks" he cursed
"What be the matter matey?" Gingerbeard got up from his station and grabbed his sword, ready to unsheathe it.
"Nothing, nothing at all" Canazza lied, the fact is, he only had basic flight training. The ship pretty much flew itself when it came to the simple things like going from A to B, but evading asteroids was beyond the automatic pilot of Starbugs, and he only had basic flight training, "I'll have to switch it to manual" he looked around for the switch for manual. It was a big red button, his instructor had told him NOT to push it, or else he'll surely die, and that was before he even started to fly.
"We have manual control" He moved the controls up, but for some reason that made them pitch downwards, He always hated computer games that use reverse controls, now he wishes he'd played it that way more. *okay* he though *up is down, down it up, forward is... something* he tried forward and the bug pitched even further down
Gingerbeard unsheathed his blade, "Put us upright or be skewered"
Canazza looked for a 'level off' button, but didn't find any, however, he did find a button he thought would come in handy. he fastened his seatbelt and pressed it. The cabin-boy and Gingerbeard went flying backwards as the artificial gravity in the cockpit was turned off.
The two exited the cockpit and landed with a thud in the mid-section, ruining a game of "spin the bottle" a few of the crew were playing.
*Just my luck to get stuck on a ship full of Waiters-come-Pirates* though Canazza as he reached for the communications panel.
"This is Dave Canazza calling any JMC vessel, Starbug 423 has been taken over by Pirates, repeat, Pirates, they are unskilled and were previously waiters in parrots, Need assistance."
He was beginning to feel queasy and turned the gravity back on, at which point Gingerbeard and a couple of Cabin-boys entered with swords
"Take 'im to the brig and chain him up" Gingerbeard growled, "Do what you want with him"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Canazza picked up the sword the guard had dropped and started swinging it about. He hit one of the cabin boys arms, which started bleeding.
"EEEEK!" the man ran out crying, several of the other fainted at the sight.
"Come back here ye scurvy dogs!" Gingerbeard drew his sword, a massive thing, about 4 foot long, very shiny, "Now it's my turn"
Gingerbeard lashed out wildly, narrowly missing Canazza, he was obviously as inexperienced as Canazza with a sword.
Canazza buried his sword into Gingerbeard's leg.
"AAH! YOU MOTHE-"
"careful, children may be listening"
"oh, sorry, AAH! YOU GIMP!" he tried again, dropping his sword. Canazza picked it up.
Gingerbeard keeled over, clutching his leg, Canazza stepped over him and out into the mid-section.
All the cabin-boys turned to him,
"He has the sword!" one of the shouted, "ALL HAIL CAPTAIN - " the man was stumped, Canazza had nothing but a crappy trainee moustache, "CAPTAIN HALF-BEARD!"
"Cool..."
"What is your first order Captain?"
Gingerbeard started clawing his way out of the cockpit,
"Umm... does anyone know first aid? We should really help your ex-captain"Name: Captain Half-beard
Status: Half-wit in charge of no-witsÂ