Tree-sy Does It
Who: Wildflower, The Big Pink Tree
Where: Red Corridor 568
Aboard the virtually empty Blue Dwarf, the Big Pink Tree and Trainee
Surgeon Jennifer Wildflower walked merrily side by side discussing the
fine arts and eating ice cream.
Well Wildflower ate the ice cream whilst the Tree carefully perched a
couple of hundred Cornetto's over it's bright pink branches. They
melted slowly under the artifical glow of the corridor lights, the
dripping sugary cream coating his blossom.
"You're making a terrible mess on the floor," nodded Wildflower
looking behind them. The ice cream trail stretched all the way back
to the turbo lift.
The tree rustled happily.
"Actually I don't think they can taste it," mused Wildflower. "I
don't think scutters have tongues."
The tree drooped a little and a few cornetto's dropped onto the floor.
Wildflower nosily slurped at hers and looked out of the view port window.
"Do you think the crew is having fun?" she asked the Tree.
It rustled thoughtfully.
"That's right. I wonder why we never get to go anywhere. We're
useful team members!"
The tree bounded happily and a few more cornetto's lauched from its
spire and into the window.
"Exactly! You could provide the medicine and I could provide the
The tree jumped even more excitedly and rustled heavily.
"I don't know how to fly a ship properly though," said Wildflower sadly.
The tree's branches drooped downwards and another Cornetto dropped to
the floor. Wildflower looked at it and took another bite from hers.
"We could always take control of the medibay whilst no one's around?
Redecorate it? Make it more accessible?"
The tree perked up at this and rustled hesistantly.
"That's an even BETTER idea!" Wildflower said rubbing her hands
together. "But we don't know how much time we have before the crew
return, so we better get hurrying if we're going to pull it off!"
The tree bounded happily and the pair of them ran mischievously
towards the medibay.
The Tree and Wildflower crept along the corridor up towards the
medibay doors. They swished open quietly and Wildflower peeked around
the corner into the medical area.
Standing next to one of the desks was the gynocologist, Bobby, looking
at the phantom doors which had mysteriously opened of their own accord.
He walked towards them, wondering if a flea had entered the bay for
some treatment or a tattoo.
As he reached the opened doors the Tree and Wildflower struck! They
leapt with alamring speed and covered Bobby in a cadaver bag, zipping
it quickly whilst he hit it from the inside trying to escape.
The tree rustled.
"Do cyborg's even breathe?"
The tree rustled and bounded, indicating a shrug. Wildflower nodded
and they tossed the bag into the supply closet opposite the Medibay doors.
"Now time to exact our plan," said Wildflower grinning.
Three floors up a lonely technician sat against the main wiring panel
of Corridor 399. As his hands probed the inside of the wall, he
noticed the Turbo lift doors open and a shifty pair of leaves exit.
The tree they were connected too stumbled along, crashing into the walls.
The technician watched curiously as the tree halted outside one of the
unused conference rooms. When he thought about it the whole corridor
was deserted; no one ever came here anymore. Why was he fixing the
He scratched his head further as a girl also exited the turbo lift.
she was wearing a large white lab coat and appeared to be pregnant
with sextuplets. He squinted and realised she was actually using the
jacket to cover some ointment jars.
They disappeared into the room and after a few minutes ran out again
back to the turbo lift, running with much more ease.
"This is going to be interesting," he said, ignoring the wires and
leaning back to watch the two miscreants.
About five hours later and the technician was chuckling silently.
Fifty minutes into the operation he'd worked out what the Tree and the
girl were up to and ever since then he'd been laughing.
The girl and the Tree made their final dart from the Turbo lift into
the disused conference room and the door slammed shut behind them.
The technician stood up and strolled down the carpeted hallway and
past the door to the conference room.
Hanging from it in the dead centre was a large thick piece of recently
cut metal. It had painted on it in JMC standard red letters: Medibay.
The technican laughed out loud and walked to the Turbo Lift, ready to
start his next job.