Efof + Ingen "What lies under the toilet"Posted by
Posted: Jul 26, 2007, 8:51am
OOC - This is being posted on behalf of trial member Jono, playing
Who: Efof and Ingen Karpov
Where: The Mollopod Mothership
When: After flushing themselves down a giant toilet.
Ingen quickly let go of the door, allowing the slug to open the
cubicle door. He tried to catch them but they had ducked into the next
cubicle. The slug watched them as they dived into the swimming pool
sized toilet and pulled the chain. They were both flushed down the
Ingen hadn't been on a rollercoaster before, but if he had, he
imagined it would be alot less painful than this.
The world was dark as pipes tossed him about in a number loops and
turns, and he slid through moss and slime and other things which made
him glad there wasn't any light. To Ingen's relief, the decidedly
unpleasant ride took only a few seconds before the pipe ended. He
flew out onto a hard floor and was momentarily blinded by the
presence of light in this new room. Just as he was deciding whether
to get up, there was a gasp overhead and a thud just near his
shoulder, and instead decided that deciding whether to get up or not
could save a man's ribs.
There was mechanical humming and hissing all around, and Ingen
shortly found he could see again. He stood and turned to see where
the pipe was. Beneath it was an open-topped cylindrical tank which
Ingen and Efof had both overshot - they were probably travelling a
lot faster than the stuff that usually went down that pipe. Next he
checked his clothing, and found with much delight that the worst
remains of the pipe ride definitely wasn't anything that came out of
a Mollopod. Then, as Efof pulled himself up nearby and Ingen brushed
himself off a little, he turned his attention to the room around him.
The room was filled with machinery and tanks and every object in view
displayed an abundance of jittering dials. Pistons were hissing and
things that shall remain undescribed flew through glass pipes and
"Where on - -" Ingen was about to say 'earth', but then reminded
himself of his location. "Where the heck are we?"
"In the poo refinery!" answered Efof proudly.
Ingen spun and stared at the man, feeling momentary suspicion. "How
do you know that?"
The Ffiofian pointed to a sign over the door, "There!"
And there, indeed, it was - written in plain, if a little crude,
English: POO REFINERY. But then Ingen remembered the cookbook, and
Efof's reading of the word document, and something clicked: "Hey, why
are these slug guys using English? Don't they have their own
Efof was growing distracted by the piping and began to walk along
beside it. "Maybe they're practicing the language for their invasion?"
Following him for lack of anywhere else to go, Ingen decided that was
the most likely answer. The pipes soon went straight through a wall,
and after going through the door beside where the pipes ended they
were blasted with heat. A room as great as a cathedral was
illuminated with crackling flames, and in the far corner more pipes
joined up with the ones they had followed to pour their collective
contents into a large heap. Mollopods were working hard to shovel poo
from the heap into a massive furnace, while a few others squelched
around monitoring the numerous dial-covered panels surrounding the
Efof had to yell to be heard above the roar of the furnace. "Are
they... using poo for ship fuel?" He cringed.
"Well, they're inventive, to say the least..." replied Ingen, trying
not to think too much about what they were doing. Luckily, his
thoughts were distracted quickly enough. The entire ship suddenly
gave an almighty shudder and he barely managed to stay on his feet;
his companion was not so lucky to stay vertical. Just as abruptly as
it had began, the ship was still again.
"What the hell was that!?" Ingen yelped, more than a little
panicked. "Spaceships don't do that for no reason!" He watched as the
shovel-weilding Mollopods barked out to another group he hadn't
previously noticed. They were sitting on a bench with a box of
kittens in front of them, and wondered what these slimy creatures
were doing with them. He received his answer just as soon as the
thought occured: one of them coughed up a furball, then he and his
companions lifted themselves from the bench, grabbed some more
shovels and began aiding in fueling the furnace.
"Maybe the ship's alive... or we're under attack!" came Efof's reply
once the man had given it a thought.
Ingen realised they'd been wasting time, standing there idly and
observing. "All the more reason to hurry up and find a way off it!"
He scanned the walls for the closest exit aside from the one they'd
come through, then swivelled and strode toward it, looking back only
to check that Efof was following. He was.
The door took them down a maze of corridors and intersections at
which Ingen and Efof took turns deciding which direction to turn.
They followed the long, winding path for what was beginning to seem
like an eternity with no sign of a door anyway, and Ingen was
beginning to worry if they were travelling in circles - if they'd
ever leave this maddeningly monotonous labyrinth. After an age of
silence, Efof spoke.
"Hold it!" he cried.
Ingen turned to find he had stopped some paces behind and was
struggling with something on the wall. He walked back. "What is it?"
"I think I've found a door!" The simple words brought a smile onto
Ingen's face, until Efof continued. "But I can't open it."
"Well, stand back and let me a have a try." There was an indent in
the wall the shape of a brick and half the size, off to the side of a
door-shaped line carved into the metal. Ingen wondered how many doors
like these they'd just walked straight past. He dug his fingers into
the indent and pulled. Nothing gave way, so he began to pull harder,
and harder, until he had his heels dug against the floor, one
shoulder against the wall, pulling with all his might and mass on the
handle. Then the door simply slid open as if of its own accord and
Ingen fell back on his rump.
Efof turned away from the wall opposite the door, finger lifting from
a block protruding from the wall, the exact size and shape of the
handle Ingen was pulling on - as if someone had just cut the block
out of one wall and stuck it on the other. "Oh. I guess this thing's
the open button, then."
As Ingen lifted himself to his feet, Efof poked his head around the
door and then slipped out. "Wait!" he hissed, thinking his companion
might not have been cautious enough, hurrying to follow. But he
grinned at the sight that met his eyes - an array of gooey ships. "A
hangar! Our ticket out of here!" He turned to smile to Efof, only to
find the man had wandered off. And then saw why.
Between each door of the hangar there were tall, slim observation
windows - reinforced, and Ingen could see the thick shutters just
waiting to close the moment the window broke. But the scene he could
see through the window caught his attention more than those shutters.
Outside, as he approached the window to look out over Efof's
shoulder, he could see colours other than black - green, red, a sky a
strange shade of auburn...
The Mollopod ship was landing.
<tag to Efof>