BlueJays syndrome?

Tomas strutted along the corridor, his long twig like fingers interlocked behind his back. The loud rapping sound of his feet resonating on the metal floor was soothing and he was in a reasonably good mood (for him) as he passed the parrots bar. Jays loud raucous laughter from the bar interior made his eardrums ache. Tomas snorted he had never been fond of that jay fellow even before his “death” ,on the other hand his death had provided multitude of patients for him to drag to his office and feel better than, but ever since his return he had been the ships hero and even more insufferable than his usual self. A thought struck Tomas’ mind, he had never brought jay in for a session. He let out a small chuckle, straightened his tie and plucked a yellowing leaf from his hair then with both palms pushed the two double doors open to the parrots bar and marched in.
With his longest finger he prodded jay in the back probably a little harder than necessary. A startled jay turned around visually displaying his annoyance on his face. Tomas tilted his head and smiled.
“Jay” he said slowly stretching out the single syllable then waiting a few seconds.
“What?! “Questioned jay with an air of despair. Again Tomas hesitated before replying; enjoying every moment of control
“well I’m very glad of how fantastically you have settled back after your travels but I’m concerned that everyone thinking you were dead has had adverse effect on your mental state, so I have taken the liberty of organising an appointment for you to meet me” Tomas smiled smugly.
”I’m sorry but who are you”."
"You are probably under the influence of alcohol so i'll let you away with that lapse of memory but I must insist you come with me ,I have orders from the top!"
"I am the top"
"oh.....never mind c'mon hop along"

"Okay ,I'm here but you've only got 15 minutes,understand?"
Tomas glanced around his office and formulated his assault on jays confidence.
"you see it is exactly that sort of sort of attitude that has led led to your deteriorated condition"
"yes those migrains,lack of sleep and your very obviouse skin condition"
jays hand leapt immediately to his stubble and began to feel a little uncomfortable"well i haven't experienced any of tho-"
"DON'T deny it ,i have been studying your behavoir for a while now and it is incredibly clear to a tree as educated as i am-"
"educated by who? None of the phyciatrists survived the Cadmiun II leakage"
"never mind just let me diagnose you" Tomas stood up and flipped a switch on the wall.The lights dimmed and a projector whirred into life on a whiteboard opposite an image came up of a the cross section of a human head tomas marched to the board and drew a human albeit a bit distorted."this"he started as circling the brain "is the usual human brain but the fact that everyone has been treating you as if you are the third coming of the messiah means that-"
"what"asked tomas annoyed at losing his train of thought
"second coming, the messiah's only visited earth once"
"great now your a religious nut too"he made a show of slowly shaking his head before continuing "the cause of you condition is the attention that the crew have been giving you recently which has inflated your ego so much that your brain is now squished in an area this big"he wiped the board clean and drew two new circles in he cross section he labeled the larger EGO and the miniscule one he labelled BRAIN"
"of course this makes complete sense"jay layered on sarcasm"and whats this this er condition called"said jay finally finding humor in this strange situation
"well its called err"Tomas was not used to clients taking interest in what he said and was momentarily flustered
"BlueJays syndrome"
"Thanks Tomas I've found this session really really enlightening and will try to look at myself more negatively and i promise i will never miss a social situation to put myself down ,now excuse me but i really have to go see you next week"
Jay was out the door before tomas recovered.he splayed his fingers and picked bark from between his joints while thinking deeply.That jay fellow would be a hard nut to crack but he better watch out 'cause he was on his radar now and somwhere sometime Tomas would find a way to get to him.Tomas leaned back in his chair and smiled.his smile quickly vanished as a yellow leaf floated past his eyes."Damm i hate shedding season"he muttered.

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