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View character profile for: White Wolf
A little pheromones will do wonders!
“So … anyhow, you mentioned that this was a mining vessel. You don’t suppose there is employment available here while my ship repairs herself?”
"Employment?" Jacky repeated. "I guess."
"What do you mean?" Candice asked.
"What I mean is that I can't talk right now. Very sorry. I have to go save my insane naked friend before he's captured by GELFs. White Wolf will fill you in on the little annoying details of it, I'm sure. Bye. Sorry. Bye."
Candice turned to look back at the Oversized Hamster, who looked a little taken by surprise as he was picking up Jackie's discarded copy of 'fellowship of the ring' then quickly stowing in one of his cheek pouches as he answered "Employment? Well, I wasn't expecting such a proposal so soon, but I guess I could accept immediately..."
Then suddenly realizing that Candice might be referring to employment other than companionship, the Rotund Hamster quickly continued, "I suppose you've already anticipated that you are going to be needing some accommodations while your Bee is under repairs. Umm, let's see now..."
White Wolf stroked the fur underneath his chin as if it were a beard in thought for a short moment before raising his right index claw and resuming, "Yes. I think there might be some suitable quarters for you just a short stroll from here off the flight deck - If you'll follow me right this way." Before turning and strolling towards one of the flight decks exit doors.
Feeling a little nervous as they walked through the corridor, the Large Hamster decided to try a little chit chat to fill Candice in on the state of things aboard the Blue Dwarf, "I suppose you also understand that with us being stranded this far away from earth that we're pretty much on a strictly barter basis when it comes to things like payment at the moment. Speaking of which, you will probably wish to visit the Promenade sometime later, for some of the little necessities of life that you can get from some of our sentient rodent vendors located there. Though, I do want to point out that they are not related to me. I used to be human being once, and those particular sentient rodents are the descendants of the whole smaller rodent population on the Blue Dwarf which had evolved during the three million years that Holly, our ship's computer, stuck the crew for their safety, into stasis to wait for the radiation from an accident to dissipate. Unfortunately, I can't tell you anything about the actual accident since I was previously stranded on another planet pretty much creating the Roo, another race of sentient rodents, but more like me than those here aboard the Blue Dwarf because Dean Thomas previously killed me with sword, oh dear, that's a whole another story that I should tell you some other time if your interested. But anyhow, the more important thing is that now we are dealing with the Belhaphasarans, the um... Shapeshifting Sex Gelf refugee's for a lack of better description, from that planet that just blew up, who are trying to... Hmm... how shall I put this... Um... breed... with the male crew at the moment. Hence, it's a real problem to tell who the real female crew members are on board at the moment and how to stop or better yet, get rid of the Belhaphasarans. Oh! Here we are."
The Grande sized Hamster stopped next to one of the corridor doors and opened it, revealing a small apartment-like crew quarters that were, very, very dusty, and he continued "These quarters should be free since I used to share them with one of the engineers who got killed back when Seymour Nipples, our current 'Royal Ambassador to the Queen of England' was the Captain of the Blue Dwarf. Seymour still thinks he's in charge sometimes, and I think you'll agree that he's a bit like Mr. Howell who has gone off his cheese, but overall he's a good fellow. But he *really* shouldn't be in charge of the ship - That's something Jay Chrysler & I am more suited for, though as you can imagine, both of us are a little uncertain if we want the job.", the Oversized paused as he wiped some dust off a nearby counter top, "Hmm, This place really could use a spot cleaning after three million years of disuse, doesn't it?"
White Wolf looked distracted for a moment as he rubbed the dusty grit off his paws, and then he gave a Hamsterish smile while continuing "Say, I know of a way you can help us right away, Candice! I need to head up to one of the science labs for an idea I have on how to deal with the Belhaphasarans. And while I'm there, I'll need you to round up all the male Blue Dwarf crewmen and get them onto the Flight deck for their own safety. Because my idea involves a wonderful variant use for a 'genetic tagging' pheromone that the Roo used back in a war with some Hymenoptera crossed Gelfie bug's that the evil Mini Phil 'emperor' in that alternate universe had manipulated in order to try & wipe out the Roo from all the Muliverses. Unsuccessfully, might I add. Anyways, I believe I can whip up a batch of it to spray on the Belhaphasarans in order to make them literally glow with bio phosphorescence. But the big problem here is, if the guys get on this spray on them, it has a lot of 'Phil' in it. Which would have a rather unfortunate side effect of a nasty case of Priapism for a couple of days, while having their... Um... Wee Wee's also 'glowing in the dark' and they'd be so testosterone poisoned that they will go running around naked fighting each with their Wee Wee's. So do you think you can handle getting them all down to the Flight deck to avoid all that?"
OOG - What on Blue Dwarf do you think is going to happen next?