“This is an article seven S.O.S distress call. My oxygen supplies are dwindling and I require urgent assistance. In exchange for safe passage, I forfeit salvage rights to the derelict I am stranded on. Coordinates as follows: 05, 06, 08.4527, 58° 58′ 20.54″. I repeat: This is an article seven S.O.S…”

“What do you make of that?” Dick asked.

“I’ve no idea what most of that means, but it sounds like a distress call to me” Smurf replied, testily.

“A damsel in distress...” Dick mused.

“It might be a trap”

“Oh, don’t be so cynical”

“We don’t know where we are or how long we’ve been away; let alone if the person allegedly in ‘distress’ is friendly, or even human; so I’d suggest you treat this with some scepticism, sir”

“She sounds human”

“Yes, but she’s also repeated the message in two other languages that I don’t hold on file. This could be an actual, real life alien”

“Ooh - first contact” Dick shifted excitedly in his seat “She could be some foxy, blue-skinned siren who will want to repeatedly and energetically thank me for saving her”

“Or she could be a hideous mass of tentacles with an entirely different taste for man flesh to what you’re thinking of.” Smurf retorted ”Even worse, she could turn out to be the sort of harpy that would murder you in your sleep, dump your corpse into space and make off with me against my will”

“I’m touched at your concern” Dick said, punching the given coordinates into the navicomp.

“That wasn’t concern. I just don’t want to be mistreated by an even more incompetent - Wait, are you actually plotting a course there!?”

“Yeah, she might be able to tell us where we are and where the Blue Dwarf is - We were meant to rendezvous with it, remember?”

“But, but...” Smurf was lost for words, it’s logic circuits momentarily taken overloaded by the sheer stupidity of Pornsak’s actions “You do realise that there’s another ship, heading on an intercept course with those same coordinates?”

“I bet she’s got glowing amber eyes” Dick said dreamily “and huge, firm - Wait, what?”

Cass has been stranded for a few weeks now and is desperate to be rescued but who is on this other ship?
I bet it's pirates...

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