Out of the frying pan . . .
Just then, a rather annoyed looking tribeperson dropped the
nearly inert form of Major Harris, who was sporting a rather pointy
pink mohawk on the floor next to another door, and he began to
jibber, "The kids... they took my gun away... and piled onto me! The
little buggers mugged me!" before falling into a inert catatonic
state again in total disbelief. The away team members were stunned
for a few brief moments as they absorbed that along with Jay's sudden
<STCP Headquarters - 2906>
Zorn finished entering the sleeper program into a submarine
file, then added it to the mainframe's database. He then flagged
Cubie's covert file for receipt of the download.
Blotz watched over his shoulder. "So what's that gonna do?"
Zorn smiled. "When Cubie downloads this file, it'll implant a
subconscious command. Within a minute, she'll bring White Wolf
directly to us. Then we can sit down and reason out a plan for
dealing with Darken before he eliminates us."
Blotz shook his head in disgust. "Never thought I'd see the day
when I was working with the Richards and a giant rat."
Blotz flopped into his Minion Manipulator 3000. "Whatever."
Everyone was still stunned at Jay's abduction.
Everyone that wasn't giggling at Harris' new hairstyle, that
is. Zack elbowed Cubie. "That's gotta be a first for Major Harris.
Wonder if that's within regs."
Cubie started to chuckle, but then stopped. A brief shimmer
went through her image, and her smile disappeared. She whipped her
elbow around, catching Zack right in the mouth. Then she turned and
marched across the room, hurling Shakespeare and DJ aside as she
approached White Wolf.
The surprised hamster looked up at her. "Are you all right,
She responded with a vicious roundhouse that narrowly missed
White Wolf's head. "What the-" Her second kick caught him in the
chest, knocking him backward.
DJ struck Cubie in the back of the head with the butt of her
rifle. Cubie threw a foot backwards, slamming DJ in the gut and
sending her tumbling in a winded heap. Then she forward-flipped over
Dirk Bell, who was cheering wildly, and landed next to White Wolf.
The hamster leapt several meters away. "Cubie! What's going on?"
Cubie disappeared, only to reappear directly behind White Wolf.
A karate chop to the neck stunned the hamster momentarily, and he
dropped to all fours, trying to clear his head. Cubie gripped the
skin behind his neck and pulled him off his feet. The hamster's feet
wriggled helplessly as Cubie held him aloft, his teeth bared as his
cheeks were pulled back behind his ears. Then she leapt across the
temple over the heads of the amazed away team, landing next to Zack.
Zack's eyes were the size of hubcaps. He'd dug out her
controller and was about to deactivate her. "Uh, sweetie?"
Her foot caught him under the chin, sending him to dreamland.
Her boot disappeared, and she grabbed the controller with her toes
and placed it on Zack's chest, then popped it open and tapped
the 'Home' button.
A tunnel appeared beneath them, and the trio dropped from
sight. Seconds later, the tunnel disappeared, leaving the doubly
stunned party staring at the stone floor where they had just been.
"Boo-YAH! Cubie's da Man! Whoo-hoo!"
Everyone turned and stared at Dirk. Dirk smiled at
them. "What? That was a good move! Got the hamster in a submission
hold and pinned Zack - all before the bell. Yeeah!"
Keto nudged Harris. "Major? White Wolf is gone. That probably
leaves you in charge."
Harris' only response was a small trickle of drool and a twitch
in his glassy-eyed expression.
Keto started prepping Ointment #6754 - a mixture of ammonia and
vaseline. A generous dab in each nostril had Harris sitting bolt-
upright and clawing at his nose while howling things that caused
everyone to blush.
Keto smiled. Despite its simplicity, it was one of his more
The tunnel opened in midair over the muddy, broken turf.
Seconds later, White Wolf, Zack, and Cubie all tumbled out of the
opening, splatting in the mud. The tunnel disappeared.
Cubie held her head in agony. "What the smeg? What happened?"
White Wolf leapt away from her. "You kidnapped me, that's
Zack burbled face-down in the mud. Cubie quickly rolled him
over onto his back and wiped the mud from his face. "I don't know.
The last thing I remember is Harris being returned with a pink
mohawk, and then suddenly I'm here making mudpies with my face."
The hamster looked around. "And where exactly is 'here'?"
They looked around. They weren't certain, but there were an
abundance of clues. Ten meters in front of them was a pavillion
under which sat several colorfully dressed people, most notably a
regal couple seated on thrones and wearing crowns. On either side of
them were several tents. Dozens of armored knights were struggling
to keep their horses in check. And behind them stood a crowd of
roughly dressed peasants. Every eye was on the newcomers.
A bearded man in flowing black robes and a gnarled oak staff
leaned over and whispered into the ear of the man with the crown.
His expression hardened. "I quite agree, Merlin." He
stood. "Lancalot! Gawain! Arrest the witch, her consort, and her
The knights drew their swords and began to advance.
Cubie looked at White Wolf, a sheepish smile. "Sorry?"
~White Wolf, Zack and Cubie - heretics extraordinaire~