My encounter with the United Research Associate
"Blue Dwarf, is that you?" the communications console buzzed to life.
James had to sit on his hands to stop himself clapping with glee, he'd been
on the job a day and he'd received his first signal!
"This is Blue Dwarf, over," James said happily.
"This is the United Research Associate Ship Meg Head. We've been lost in
space for years, thank god we found you!"
"If you give me your co-ordinates I'll send a rescue part straight out,"
James smiled, he was actually rescuing a ship that had been lost in space
for years! A ship from a branch of the Space Core he hadn't even heard of!
This must be worth a medal or something.
"Can you put us through to your Captain?" the Captain of the Research Vessel
asked.
"Right away!" James smiled, he span round to face Captain Cannon, "Sir?" he
said sounding pleased with himself.
"Yes Johnson?" the Captain sai werely.
"U R A S Meg Head!" James announced, then he realised what he'd said, and
noticed the Captain slowly turning red.
"Ah, that is to say, um, err..." Johnson continued, beginning to suspect he
was the subject of a prank call.
Coming to all stop" said the Nav officer Kieran Loes.
"Engines answering all stop" said a crackly voice of chief engineer Lt.
Smegg over the comm system.
The blonde bimbo sensor operator who was standing in for Ensign Kayn filed
her nails and briefly looked at her sensor screen. she shouted:
"There's a massive blip on radar!"
Then she blushed in embarassment as everyone told her it was only the planet
they were supposed to find.
James breathed a sigh of relief and returned to the communications console,
"Okay, games up!" James said, "You've had your fun, who are you really?"
The prankster told him and James made a mental note to file a report against
Officer Michael Mouse.
James was really excited when he heard there was going to be an away
mission, he ran down to meet Commander Niples as he got ready to board the
Starbug, "Sir," James said saluting, "Requesting to join the away mission,
sir."
Niples looked at him, "Permission denied."
James followed Niples onto the Starbug, "But sir, I've always wanted to go
on an away mission."
"Really?"
"Yes sir! I want to be as valuable as a part of the crew as I can."
"Great, I think I've got a use for you."
"Really sir!" James said brightening up.
"Yep, when I get back I always feel like having a bath, so run me a nice hot
one when you hear we're coming back, and use the anti-exma bubble bath
okay?"
James sighed, "But sir!"
The doors to the Starbug clunked shut locking James out, and the ship
launched out towards the brown planet.
James wandered back up to the Drive room in a sulk. After a while he bribed
the bimbo on sensors to swap consoles. Then he saw it, something orbiting
the planet! He got one of the cameras on the ship exterior, and used it to
zoom on the object, it was a space station! Still in tact after all these
years. James glanced around, then slipped out of the drive room and wandered
down to where the Blue Midgets were stored...
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