*ACTION!* Lets do the time warp agaaaiiinn......um..again.

(there was a little bit of a posting conflict seconds before i sent this so its been re-written, by myself and Dean!)
 
"Actually," said Dean, "It gets worse."
"How can it get worse?"
"Well, Holly's gone back to 1996."
"So?"
"So he's running Windows 95."
"We're dead." said Phil, watching as a screen behind Dean came up with "Error 2094: Immediate and complete buggeration of system in progress."
<END SNIP>
 
Jay was still glaring at Keith all through this, how could he do anything else, Wirral’s had a piece of Carrot the size of a hubcap attached to his face, he looked on in disgust then said simply “Lets hit the drive room”
 
 
The FeBuggures, The Chrysler’s and Wirral entered the drive room, having battled their way through the Spanish armada, the battle of hastings and the Barney the Dinosaur movie marathon, the latter causing further delay as Tara tried to console Phil and talk him out of suicide.
Not forgetting when the Red Baron challenged Jay to a dogfight and when Rufus barely escaped with his life after an encounter with a tribe of cannibals who thought he would go well with chicken gravy.
 
Rufus, still trying to wash the onions out of his hair wandered over to the space that Jay, Phil, Dean Alota were standing in.
“So……what do we do?” he asked.
“Well…” said Phil “We’re not sure but it looks like when the temporal cannon hit the ‘Dwarf it overloaded, which caused a feedback sending it back through time but shattered the temporal continuum around the entire ship”
“English please Phil” Tara said, walking across the drive room with coffee’s in hand.
“Basically” said Jay “Its all gone screwed…”
“Forgive my husband’s use of technical Jargon Tara…” Alota said, “But we need to find a way to reverse the effects of the Temporal cannon”
“Why not just use the time drive from the planet” Tara asked, sipping from her Café Latte’
“Don’t be stupid” Keith said from across the room, where he was spinning himself round and round in the captain’s chair “Only an idiot would think that could work!”
“You know…” said Dean “That could work!”
“I rest my case..”
“SHUT IT YOU PEBBLE CRAPPING MORON!!” Jay shouted. “Although I gotta be honest, I’m kinda fuzzy as to how it can work too. Sure It’ll get us back to 2103, but how will it bring the ship in line with the relative time zone?”
“Well…” said Phil “You see, the time drive basically surrounds the vessel with a temporal field, with a variable quantum probability…it literally pulls the ship apart molecule by molecule and reassembles it in the selected time zone…if I’m right then as it reassembles the ship in our time it will be reassembled with the correct timeframe right across the ship”
“Oh” said Jay
“How do we know it’ll work” asked Alota
“Trust me!” said Phil, perkily
“I’ll get the escape pods ready…” said Jay
“Listen it’s simple…” said Phil “Jay you program a set of spatial coordinates into the navi-comp for re-entry into our time frame, I’ll set the time-drive.”
“Ok but if we crash into anything I’m not taking the blame!” said Dean, quickly.
“Of course.” Said Tara, “before any of this can actually be achieved we need to FIND a navi-comp”
“Oh yeah.” Said Phil, Jay and Dean all at once.
“Hang on.” said Dean after a few moments thought. “I’ve had an idea!”
“EVERYBODY DOWN!” yelled Phil.
“I resent that.” Said Dean, “but listen. The smaller shuttlecraft have navi-comps right? But they are all smaller ones. If we can get them working in tandem, they’ll provide the same power as the original did…”
“…and if we can somehow hardwire them into the BD we should be able to do it.” Said Jay, picking up his subordinates line of thought.
“Dean.” Said Phil, “Are you sure that DNA machine hasn’t altered you?”
“Yup.” Said Dean.
“Important question.” Said Alota, “can we actually do this?”
“Well.” said Phil, “It has never been tried but I see no reason why not. If Jay and I start doing the hardwiring/hacking now we can launch within the hour”
“Go for it.” Alota ordered. So they did.
<SOME HOURS LATER>
Phil tapped a sequence of commands into the time drives controls, as Dean did the same in the navicomp.
“Set…spatial co-ord’s  45634-445-67489..wait a sec..Dean, have you let Mini-Phil into my office..and more importantly my files again?” Jay asked
“Why do you ask?” Dean said
“These are the coordinates for a strip joint in Soho” said Jay.
“And how would you know that?” Asked Alota.
“I..er……Um..OH LOOK WE’RE READY TO LAUNCH!”
“Countdown…” Phil said “5…4…3…2…1…”
“Engaging S.T.U.F.F.E.D. drive” said Phil, “Firing engines” Jay relayed, and began to manoeuvre the ‘Dwarf into the time portal that had opened in front of the vessel. The ship was battered by turbulence as it passed through, then the entire room was filled with a blinding light, which soon faded, as the crew’s eyes re-adjusted to the normal light levels, they saw, much to their delight that the Drive Room had been restored to its
former glory, in fact, it was brand spanking new, the mouse-mats hadn’t even been doodled on.
“It worked!” Alota said “It SMEGGING WORKED!”
“I wouldn’t count your chickens yet honey…” Jay said, not taking his gaze off the navi-comp display.
“What?”
“Well…the ship seems to have been restored to it’s original condition…but Earth…”
“What?”
“Well..the entire planets surrounded by orbital defence platforms…whats more..”
“WHATS MORE WHAT?”
“Pluto’s missing…”
 
 
 
<Ok so it's not the most dramatic end to a plot but noone came up with any better ideas! :D!
 
Over to you Ben!!…>
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