Seymour - "New Tenerife"

Who: Seymour Niples
Where: The holiday planet of 'New Tenerife'
When: Present time
Seymour finally arrived at his destination and the taxi spiralled
through the sky and to the ground where it landed on a tarmac landing
pad.
After an irrationally long wait at this planet's customs, Seymour
eventually stepped out into the fresh air. It was warm and dry, and
lacked any kind of wind, making the heat unbearable in his suit.
Tropical palm trees had been planted to line the streets, and Seymour
looked up to see the sky filled with extremely large white hotels
which glistened artificially. This entire planet was a holiday
resort, and he hated it. This was the planet of 'New Tenerife',
popular with so many holidaymakers from the entire galaxy.
He hated the way everything was created to be so clean and sterile,
but in reality was dirty and far too busy. This planet was absolutely
crowded with people, and tour buses taking people to their hotels.
Just a short walk away from where Seymour was standing was a beach
which was rammed full of holidaymakers laying on sunbeds to work on
their tans. New Tenerife boasted a coastline that was so long, that
it was apparently three times longer than the circumference of the
planet. Seymour wasn't entirely sure how this was possible, but was
amazed that even with a beach this long it seemed pretty full.
The heat got to him pretty fast and Seymour soon became one of those
red faced middle aged men on holiday with only a knotted hanky on his
balding head to stop the sun from burning him. Beads of sweat ran
down his face and he puffed and panted as he struggled with his hand
luggage through the crowd of scantily-clad tourists.
Luckily, it wouldn't be too long before Seymour was out of the crowd.
But this didn't comfort him. He pushed rudely through the sea of semi-
naked bodies until he got to a docking pier where a man wearing a
Hawaiian shirt was holding a lard sign with the word "Nipples"
written on it in large letters.
Seymour approached the man and shook his head. "What the hell is
that?" He asked and pointed to the sign.
The man wearing the Hawaiian shirt blinked a few times at the
newcomer, and then looked at the sign he was holding. "It
says 'Nipples'." He said.
"And?" Seymour said angrily, with his fists on his hips.
"Ah. I see what you mean, you want to know why someone is holding a
sign saying 'Nipples' on the busy seafront of a popular tourist
resort. Well it's not some kind of protest, if that's what you mean.
And I'm certainly not selling Nipples. Or offering them as a
service." The man quickly said. "I'm here to pick up a man named
Nipples. Seymour Nipples."
Seymour cringed. "Niples." He said.
The man squinted a bit in confusion.
"Niples, one 'p'.Pronounced Neep-Lay. It's French." Seymour
patronised.
"Oh. Are you Mr Nipples then?"
"Neep-Lay!"
The man put his palms out apologetically. "Of course, sorry. My
mistake."
"I'll just get into the boat then shall I?"
"Yes please."
The man helped Seymour into the boat, who just sat there clutching
his hand luggage, glad to be getting away from all these people.
<TBC>