Welcome to the Jungle

What was he doing here?

<snip>Okay, we'll need someone to collect any stray dry wood along this shoreline here for making a fire later to help us keep warm by as it may get cold tonight, and if we're lucky, maybe cook any food we can scare up to eat. Alex, why don't you go do that? </snip>
<snip>”... Enjoy picking up sticks Alex!” </snip>

Oh yeah, sticks... something to do with sticks. Wood, that was it.

He'd wandered part way along the lake's shore before drifting into the trees, and now he stood in the middle of a thickly wooded area. He was confused, and tired, and decided to rest on a large flat rock for a while. He wished he had a cigarette. And a kebab.
He sighed and looked around, the trees were different to any he'd seen before, it was subtle but they were strange, he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was though. Maybe it was the way the-
His thoughts were interrupted by the shriek of a bird wheeling overhead, it sounded kind of like an eagle, probably wasn't though.
Despite all the shade around it was getting stuffy, so he let his blanket drop to the rock and stretched in the warmth, which pulled at his staples. Meh, they'd probably have to come out soon. He didn't particularly relish the thought of Phi yanking them out without proper medical equipment.

<snip>judging by the mists hanging above the lake and the low position of the sun above the verdantly craggy mountains in the distance, Cass guessed that the local time was probably somewhere around seven or eight in morning, and while it was just pleasantly warm at the moment, she could tell by the intensity of the sun on her face, that the day would develop in time into a humid scorcher </snip>

It really was warm. The combination of the heat and the alcohol was making him drowsy, maybe he could get away with taking a nap. He shook his head, trying to focus his thoughts; He knew better than that, he knew full well that he shouldn't go to sleep in unknown territory, in such an obvious position... A large flat rock in the middle of a clearing..? Get it together Solvay. But he was so tired.
He'd just close his eyes for a minute or two.

---

An angry Cass walked away and he reached out to touch her shoulder. She wheeled around and it wasn't Cass now, it was Brittany. He stepped back in shock and she moved towards him, eyes chilling him to the core. He tried to back away further but something was behind him, stopping him. She smiled, as if to calm him, but it didn't feel like a smile of kindness.
She was close now, too close, and she moved a hand backwards. He couldn't make out what she was doing, then he realised she was holding something sharp, one of Unit One's attachments. The smile fell from her lips and she plunged it into him, in the same place the Huzzard had inflicted the wound.


He woke up with a roar of a scream and sweating something chronic.

He nearly screamed again as he noticed the massive bird sitting before him staring at him, head cocked. Its large, sharp, beak looked like it could easily tear him apart with a few quick slashes.
It wasn't the cosiest of things to wake up to.
“Easy...” he told it and held up a hand. “Easy.”
Head and heart pounding, he shuffled backwards off the rock, knelt down behind it and dragged his blanket with him. Shit. He was so hungover, he could really do without this crap.
The giant bird poked a head around the side of the rock.
Alex swallowed. “Go'way please.”
“HWWAAARHK!”
“Jesus.”
He glanced around, looking for possible escape routes, deciding his best bet was a dash into the trees behind him. He pulled himself into a sickly crouch, and threw a stone the other way. The bird looked briefly after it, then snapped its head back to focus on him again.
“HWAAAHRK!”
Less than two seconds. Still, he'd take what he could get.
He chucked another stone and ran into the trees, bird soon hot on his heels.

“LEAVE ME ALONE.” Ow. Even through the adrenaline, his head thumped.
He crashed through the undergrowth into a far more jungly area of the forest, cast about and spotted a tree with a hole in its base, large enough for a human to hide in. That'll do. He slid into it, panting with relief as the bird frustratedly thudded against the entrance then withdrew a few steps to chastise him with a honk. For few moments he rested, unfortunately however, a magnificently coloured furry spider chose that moment to mosey across the roof of the hole.
Completely ashamed of the fact, and something he'd never admit to anyone but himself, Alex was smeg-scared of spiders. It was one of the reasons he enjoyed space travel, there weren't generally many spiders. He would never hurt one and he could remove one from a room if he had to, but not with his bare hands, and not without twisting inside with secret revulsion. He'd hated it every time his unwitting wife had called him to remove spiders from the bath or bedroom. This fear was the main reason he'd been so unsettled when he'd first met Unit One. He wished it were here, and operational, now though.
The bird thunked away outside, the spider crept nearer, and Alex sweated. Then the undeniably cute but also horrifying and hideous spider gently reached out a solitary leg and touched him. If Alex had dared open his mouth at this juncture, he would have declared “that's it, I'm done” before he'd barrelled out of the hidey hole and accidentally smashed into the bird.

They rolled over and over, slipping down a bank, and ending up on part of the lakeside. When they came to a stop Alex moved quickly away as the bird pulled itself into a dazed sit. It looked confused and its vulnerability tugged at his empathy for a moment.
“You'll be all right” he told it, and slipped into the trees before it could regain its senses.

Head full of bass drums he picked his way back to where he'd last seen the others. He hoped they'd not gone far.

Seymour looked up as Alex tramped into the camp. He looked even more awful than before. He'd lost his blanket, he was covered in dirt and... were those feathers?
“Good God man, what happened to you?”
“Long story.”
“You've been gone hours.”
“I was getting firewood.” He threw three pathetic sticks at Whitewolf's feet.
“Uh...” He nodded to the roaring fire. Alex shrugged.
“Nice boxers...” Jaxx told him.
They were red and had snowmen on them. To be fair, they were the ones he wore as a last resort when all his others were in the wash.
“Wasn't expecting to be evacuated to a planet, was I?” He grumped.

He went and sat down next to Phi.
“Eugh, Alex, you stink! When was the last time you showered?”
“'Bout five days ago.”
“... or cleaned your teeth with something other than alcohol?”
“Sorry.”
He shuffled away from her, his hangover making him miserable and antisocial, and flooding him with a keen need to withdraw into himself again. At least he hadn't thought about Jess and the kids for- Ah.

He picked a feather from his chest and realised he should probably tell the others about the bird before he shut off.
“By the way Cass was right about big animals, there's a giant bird. It wants to eat me, hump me or befriend me, and it's the size of a horse” he told them.

Then he lie down, wishing he'd not left his blanket at the rock, wishing he'd not been drinking like a loser, and wishing he'd eaten. He rolled his eyes as his stomach growled like an angry bear.

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