The Adventures of Dick Pornsak Part 4

They had been in the closet for quite some time and Dick was feeling rather confused, not to mention uncomfortable given that he was now in fact sharing the tiny enclosed space with an attractive human female while wearing only his underpants. To make matters worse she was now wriggling out of her alien disguise and was wearing an outfit that would make Barbarella blush.

"Don't you have some other clothes with you?" Dick squeaked trying not to notice her near naked body as it shifted in the dark closet close to his own.

"No." she frowned up at him, "There isn't allot of room in that costume."

"There's even less in your new one." spluttered Dick.

She looked down at herself and then up at him, "Do you mean to imply that you are becoming aroused?" she asked with an interest that was clearly academic.

"What? No.. no of course not."

"He so is." interrupted Smurf as he hovered close by.

"I am not!" protested Dick as he covered his offending parts with a nearby mop head.

"Interesting." the woman said as she began to tap on a small device attached to her wrist.

"What are you doing?" asked Dick.

"I am arranging a small hop back through time." she murmured as she concertinaed on her work.

"A what?"

"You heard me." she said impatiently, "I should be able to manage several hours for the three us without putting too much strain on the power cell."

"But that is impossible, time travel is impossible."

"Says the man wearing a pair of underpants that emit a quantum shield preventing him from being sucked back into a pocket universe of his own making." She gave him a blank look, daring him to respond.

"Well ok," he said at last, "But why?"

"Because," she explained, "The equine denizens of this station are under the sway of an organisation that would also dearly love to capture the technology held in your..."

"Pants." Dick offered.

"Yes." she confirmed, "and if they get hold of it mankind..."

"Humankind." interrupted Smurf, "mankind is an outdated reference to the human race popular with the patriarchal societies of the twentieth century."

"She is from the future!" Dick snapped, but the woman that he knew only as Zed simply shook her head and continued.

"Humankind will be doomed. Our best chance of escaping is on your ship, but right now that ship is under heavy guard. If we can skip back to when you first docked we can steal your ship before that have chance to impound it and be away."

"To where? for what?"

"We need to find an alien known only as the Grand Poobah, only he holds the secret to removing your undergarments so that I can take them back to the future and save... humankind."

"Ah well.." Dick stammered.

"We must go now." she interrupted, "put your arms around me, and ask your robot to nestle between us."

"I will do no such thing." said Smurf, while at the same time Dick said, "Put my arms around you? like all the way around."

Loosing patience the woman raised her weapon and pointed it at the two in turn, "No more words, no more protests. You hold on to me and you.. nestle."

Moments later the closet was filled with a blinding white light and a muffled scream from Smurf and the fabric of reality was torn asunder to send the unlikely trio back in time.

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