Characters in this post
View character profile for: Cassandra Jones
View character profile for: Talon Joss
Talon noticed Cassandra Jones running by. It took that long for him to smell the burning smoke in the air, wafting up from the Promenade. Perhaps that was why the lift stopped here. He reached out and grabbed Cassandra by the shoulder, shouting, "Wait! What's going on?" He was certain the fighters had destroyed everything that was a threat out there.
Cass wheeled around, angrily jerking out of his grasp. “Get the fuck off me”
Somewhat alarmingly, Talon noted one of her hands moving towards her hip, where a gun might normally be holstered “Whoa” he raised his hands, placatively “I didn’t...”
“You don't get to touch me!” Cass belatedly remembered that she was unarmed and instead narrowed her eyes “Fucker”
Her outburst was punctuated by an explosion, which tore through the burning garden centre behind her, rocking the Promenade and launching debris through the air.
Propelled by the blast, a bottle of liquid manure sailed out of the garden centre and hit Cass square across the shoulders; the force of the impact knocking her off her feet as the bottle bust and showered her in effluent.
The sprinkler system deployed a few seconds later, adding insult to injury, by soaking Cass to the skin within seconds.
Talon, left standing beneath a miraculously inoperable sprinkler, shifted uncomfortably as he looked down at the bedraggled and winded Chaplain struggling feebly at his feet. Normally, he’d have offered a hand up; but she’d seemed quite insistent about the ‘No touching’ thing...
“Fuck” Cass wheezed, slowly pushing herself up on all fours as the sprinklers chattered to a halt.
“Are you okay?” Talon asked, a little nervously.
Grumbling, Cass just ignored him and struggled to her feet “What the hell just happened there?” she pushed her wet hair up out of her eyes.
“Bing Bong” Holly’s voice boomed out across the intercom, interrupting Talon, before he could reply “Orrite everyone, let’s have your attention. Our science girls and boys have been doing a bit of analysis of what’s going on at the moment. Turns out that there’s some sort of cause and effect stuff happening. Take a gander at this...”
Screens and monitors across the ship flickered on, to display a pair of scientists, both wearing white lab coats.
“Hello” they beamed at the camera.
“I’m Professor Honeydew” said one
“And I’m Dr. Heiter” said the other.
“We’re here to demonstrate the causality phenomena, currently affecting the ship”
“Karma, if you will” Heiter’s lined face creased into a mirthless smile.
“Now, now, Dr. Heiter. We’re in the business of fact and analysis not superstition” Honeydew said, airily “This is simple cause and effect. Observe”
Turning to his co-presenter, he pulled a Shock Stick out, from inside his lab coat “If I inflict a mild electric shock on my esteemed colleague, thus...” Honeydew jabbed the business end of the Shock Stick onto Dr. Heiter’s torso, making him spasm and collapse to the floor with a strangled cry “My malicious intent is immediately rewarded with an appropriate – Argh”
The Shock Stick sparked and malfunctioned in his hand, sending a violent jolt of electricity through his body, which felled him immediately.
“Now...” Dr. Heiter grunted as he struggled back to his feet “At the moment, we don’t know where this effect is originating from, or why, but it does appear to be getting stronger; so our current advice is: Be nice to each other”
“Indeed” Honeydew wheezed as he too clambered back to his feet “We could see the situation worsening to the point where even thinking about bad things could trigger an effect”
Alarmed at this, Talon hurriedly tore his eyes away from casually studying the way Cassandra’s wet blouse clung to her, as she struggled out of her sopping jacket.
“Or perhaps,” Heiter continued, darkly “we might see an inversion of the effect, where malicious actions are rewarded with positive effects”
“That’s pure speculation” Honeydew snapped “And in any case, until proven ineffective, our advice still stands: Be nice to each other” he paused and nodded to the camera “Thank you all for your attention”
The picture faded to be replaced with Holly’s bobbing visage “So there you go” he nodded “It might be difficult, but be nice
“While I’m on, there’s a major incident going on at the Flat Earth Garden Centre, down on the Promenade. The Captain wants the emergency squads down there pronto”
The screens faded to black once more, leaving Talon to raise his eyebrows and nod towards the garden centre “I know we’re not part of the emergency services, but something really bad must have happened in there - Do you think we should go and see if we can help?”
Cass scowled and, for a moment, considered telling Talon exactly what she thought of his idea, but remembered that she was meant to be playing nice “Yeah” she said wearily “I suppose we should”
As the first of the emergency teams began arriving on the scene, they turned and began making their way towards whatever horrors had occurred in the garden centre.
So, what has gone on in there?
Think alien plants, evil owners, psychotropic botany, plots to destroy the ship – anything you like