Five Stars of Fun, Part I

When word had reached Artemis about the upcoming detour to a space resort, he was both elated and nervous.

It would be nice for the crew to sit back and unwind. It would be a nice change from starving to death, finding ways to forget about starving to death, making poems about starving to death, and rioting about starving to death. Then again, trouble had a habit of finding the Motley 'Dwarfers, and detours more often than not turned into pure terror (case in point, the beach debacle).

Regardless, Artemis was remaining optimistic. It would be a fantastic opportunity to get the kids off the ship for a bit, especially since they were going stir crazy (Artemis could always lobotomize them into behaving, but taking them to the resort was the option that wouldn't result in a divorce).

Artemis was carefully, and scientifically, packing his suitcase and bug-out-bag.

"Dear, would the syringe gun work or would something magnetic be a better choice?" Artemis asked, trying to decide between the handy syringe gun and an old magna-gun he built in High School.

The Missus weighed the options in her head, and pointed to the Magna-Gun.

"Good idea, I doubt syringes would do any damage against computer avatars, but I'll pack both just in case" Artemis packed both guns, and plenty of ammo. He also packed away some firearms for the other crewmembers...just in case...and some of his custom-made ordnance. Once the bug-out-bag was packed Artemis got to work packing the two suitcases that would serve his children.


The Skuttlings periodically arrived with toys, clothing, and misc. trinkets that they wanted to bring.

Artie Jr. tried to slip a few vials of chemicals past his mother, who snatched them from him and scolded him for trying to bring science on Holiday.

"Bad boy, Junior" Artemis said, slipping the vials into his hull and winking to his son, who happily scurried away to finish packing.

"Alright, Mr. Chrysler said to pack sensibly...I think this will be enough, we can probably buy whatever else we need while we're there, I've got enough unchashed paychecks stashed in my safe to buy this ship from the JMC" Artemis commented.


The pack of skuttlings rushed out the door.

"I really hope this doesn't blow up in my face" Artemis said to The Missus as he sealed their quarters and locked the door.


"You said the previous visitors wanted a murder mystery, so you can do interesting stories here, too?" Tara asked.

"Oh, yes. We've got escape from a vicious Jungle, that's a fun -" he started to say, but was cut off by a resounding NO from everyone except Jamie. Their last ordeal on Fernandos had obviously taken its toll on everyone's sanity.

"Ok, no jungles." Grovely said. "Please, tell me what you want to see. I am afraid the entire station changes, so we can't account for separate choices from each visitor, if a group such as yourselves arrives. I've got Tropical Paradise, Orient Express, Dragon filled dungeons..." He went through the list, and the scene changed for each one.-<snip>

The crew murmured amongst themselves, trying to figure out their dream holiday.

"Orient Express? Would we really spend an entire trip on a train? We already live on a mining ship...."
"What about the bouncy castles?"
"What about some sort of Star Trek themed resort?"
"What uh...what about a five star tropical resort?"

Everyone stopped, Artemis was raising his hand.

"I'm just seems like the perfect sim. Nothing fanciful or scientific, just a plain old resort" Artemis continued. "We've been everywhere else, hell, we've been to Victorian England, 21st century United States, we've even been to Egypt! Why not just go with a simple 22nd century resort?"

The crew seemed to relish the idea of a 'plain old resort', it would be the perfect vacation. Spas, beaches, and all the food they could eat!

"Alright, I think that sounds sensible, good thinking Artie" said Jamie.

"Hell, there's worse things than parking your ass on a beach for days on end" Cass commented, picturing doing nothing for the next few days.

"I feel...neutral. I wasn't programmed to appreciate luxury..but I guess I can simulate it....SIMULATING....oh what joy!" H-343, still mounted in Artemis' hull, chirped from his perch.

"Alright, 22nd century tropical resort..." Grovely skimmed through the catalog, humming a tune.

"There we go!" he changed the sim to a colossal tropical was the most beautiful thing the crew had seen in a long time.

"You've all been comped 10,000 resort dollars! no cash value, and you can win more in some of the fabulous contests we have throughout the resort! Your rooms will be decorated and equipped based on your personal preferences...plenty of alcohol for the alcoholics, snack food for the hungry, and of course toys and candy for the kids! Enjoy, and if you should ever need anything, just ask!" The avatar disappeared, leaving the crew standing in the courtyard of the main tower....all they had to do now was check in!


I hope you guys are cool with a modern tropical resort! It's got the same level of tech that Earth had when we left, hence being a "modern" resort. You've got free rooms and a crap-ton of Resort Cash to blow through!

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