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Please don't kill my friendsPosted by
Posted: Feb 4, 2014, 2:22pm
OOC-This likely won't be my best work, I'm having a hard time thinking straight
Some Time Ago
Artemis stumbled through the TELOMERE lab, hungover from Dr. Parsons' funeral and subsequent "welcome back" party. Frank hadn't been allowed to go (not being an actual scientist) and was forced to keep working.
"The sequences aren't working. They don't seem to be accepting the genes we added to make them sapient" Frank said.
Artemis downed another glass of irradiated GELF liquor and climbed onto the lab counter.
"Because there's no....other sapient species 'cept...." Artemis pointed at Frank.
"NO! Twat....it's SCHUMANS! SCHUMAN BEINGS!" Artemis grabbed a petri dish. "Thish isn't compatible wif the otteh genes becos teh others are REAL, not artificial. Shou can't combine dis many real genes and a fake one, it don' work,"
Artemis spat in the petri dish and handed it to frank.
"Huh, that makes sense. No wonder I don't remember any of it, that irradiated shit'll kill your brain" Artemis said, looking at the test tube containing the new mixture. He handed it to Frank.
"With this, we might be able to give Lindstrom his...geh...'family' and possibly find a way out of here. What were you saying about DNA locks earlier?"
"The prison is kept in check with DNA locks, all guards and personnel are registered. If we can get ahold of Dr. Lindstrom's DNA we might be able to...."
Gums walked past on the overhead catwalk.
"FYI gentlemen, the Warden is sending the defense forces to kill your friends following a failed escaped" he said. "The Warden is on the observation deck"
"What! Oh shit!" Artemis charged up the stairs and down the corridors.
Lindstrom watched with glee as the battle ensued. The canaries, battlemechs, and gunships encircled the revolting miners.
"LINDSTROM!" Artemis dragged Lindstrom away from the window.
"What are you doing?!"
"Putting down your stupid friends once and for all, maybe then we can stop all this temporal trespassing and sticking our kuk's in everything" Lindstrom said proudly
"Don't kill them!"
"Why not?! They're a security threat, if I don't execute them than I'll lose face"
"And if you do, you'll go childless"
"Oh please one hit off the shock collar and you'll go back to work"
"Really? I once resisted the demands of simulant pirates even after they cut my foot off, then there was when those terrorists took over the lab and beat the hell out of me because I wouldn't build them a plutonium powered pinball machine. The threat of physical pain doesn't affect a man who is more stubborn than....well fuck I can't think of an example"
".....fine, they live for now. But you better come through with my damn family"
Lindstrom tapped a button on his wrist-mounted control device, sending an automated stand-down order.
"I still expect you all to show up for dinner, It'd help me regain some face. Like a charity case or some shit like that..." Lindstrom said, leaving the room.
Artemis heaved a sigh of relief and returned to the lab. He and Frank had to think of how they were going to manipulate the DNA security system.
Dinner is now mandatory! (go ahead and start, we're to arrive before Lindstrom does)
We'll be eating in some sort of grandiose dining hall, eating high-end food (each is tailored to your specific taste). The dining room will be locked down tight, with some heavy security around the corner.
Don't worry about getting the DNA, I've got that covered